Okay, so things did not go right for me yesterday.

First of all, I had all these grand plans to go bike riding. The weather, which was gorgeous yesterday, decided that today there should be rain. Lots of rain. Too much rain. No bike ride for me.

Then I went to get my hair cut. That went well: cute, short, yay. Then I came home and dyed it brown. A nice, choclatey brown that is similar to my natural color, maybe a few shades darker. You know what color my hair is right now? It's BLACK. Funeral home black.

Okay, that's not true. It's 90% black. There are plenty of patches where my hair is still brown because I am too dumb to color my hair correctly. And those patches of brown actually make me happy because I DONT WANT BLACK HAIR. I had black hair. It took three thousand years to grow out. Now I have black hair again... mostly. ARGH!

Also, I have a terrible yeast infection. Yeah, I'm sure you all are glad to know that. But the women out there are with me. Yeast infections suck. That is an understatement. And having to spend $15 for Monistat doesn't exactly fill me with glee either. I wonder if it's the fault of the birth control pills? I am also breaking out and eating a lot of chocolate. I'm hoping all these things will resolve themselves within a few weeks.

I was in a bad mood yesterday, but then I had a package from Charlotte waiting for me. Birthday present! I was in a good mood just seeing the package at my door. And then I opened it: this really cool box/purse type thing that's decorated with stamps. All kinds of stamps: Olympics and Disney and Dutch stamps, and weird inflatable orange thing stamps, and a stamp with Fergie on it. I don't know what a box so cool is worthy of.

Inside the box: homemade soap. There's something so wonderful about a gift that someone has made for you-- whether it be banana bread or a mix CD or soap. And she's really gotten ambitious: now her soaps have embedded objects in them and glitter and all sorts of things. I talked to her later and she pointed out the "mistakes" in the soaps, but I honestly think it's part of their charm.

The cutest part is that they're all wrapped in cellophane and she's written on the outside what the scent is. I love that. I guess it's because when we first became friends, we would write endless notes and letters to each other. I used to get so excited every time I was about to read one. And to this day, the sight of her handwriting makes me happy.

Another good thing that happened yesterday was that I started my art project. I am taking Van Gogh's paintings and putting them on sort of thick cardboard and adding some poetry and some art and what have you. I wasn't sure how it was all going to come together, but I did the first one yesterday. I have to say, in all modesty, it may be the best piece of art ever created in the history of the world.

I did another one and it isn't very good at all. But that's okay. Fluke or not, I dig the first one.

Today has been better.

I went for a ride today, finally, thankfully. I can tell that I've lost some of my mojo over the past week-- I only went five miles, and I had a headache halfway through. But my knee seems to be holding up okay. It's hurting a little now, but I think that's more because I worked a long shift.

I also read the script my sister sent me and although I can't tell you even one detail of the top secret contents, I will tell you that it's good. It was a little dense at first, but once I got into it, I couldn't put it down. If you like science fiction, I'm willing to bet you'll like it. I wasn't excited about the show before, but now that I've read the script, I am.

And work was good. Unlike Tuesday's frustrating closing shift, tonight's went well. I still feel a little overwhelmed, but I am beginning to get the hang of all the supervisory stuff I have to do. Navigating through the computer system and cash control and all that. We left the store looking great and everyone was in a good mood.

My assistant manager Becky told me the funniest story. She was talking about how naïve she used to be about sex-- apparently she grew up in a house where sex was not mentioned. When she was nineteen, she was working at Starbucks and they were doing an inventory. She was working with her supervisor, and they were looking at these thermoses we have that are shaped kind of like big bullets.

Her supervisor said, "Oh, the dildos! Ha! Yeah, we have five dildos in stock." She didn't know what a "dildo" was, so she thought, hey, that must be the name of the thermos. (As soon as she got to this point in the story, I was thinking, oh no. This is not going to end well.)

Cut to the next afternoon, when a customer standing in line asks to purchase a thermos. And Becky says, "Oh! You mean a dildo!" Then she yells across the store (which is of course full of customers) "Hey, Joe! Can you grab me one of those dildos!?"

The women at the counter gets this shocked Christian Coalition look on her face and says, "What?!!" Becky smiles and says, "Oh, that's what they're called!" The customer says, "Well! I certainly don't want one now!" and she just storms right out of the store, as indignant as you please.

Becky told me that all the customers in line and all her co-workers were just standing there with their mouths open. And she's all, "What? What did I say?"

"Then she saw a little scribble at the bottom, which said, 'CALL' and then some more writing with an SSI in it. 'Call for assistance' maybe? She wasn't sure. A spirit seemed to be crying out for help, and she couldn't figure it out."